Yoga has a way of providing space. When I was in my twenties I attended my first yoga convention or conference in Phoenix Arizona and I stayed with my Brother at that time. An upwardly mobile young accountant my brother asked me on the first evening what is all this Yoga stuff about. My reply was simple "I think it is a way to open the body and the heart up and find more space to live our lives". I did not really "get it" my brother for sure did not understand what I was talking about, and he told me so. Over the years I have understood this topic of space from physical and meta-physical perspectives. I have seen it unravel emotional strongholds in myself and in my clients. I have watched physical bodies melt, and I have seen them clamp and shut down over trauma and pain. I have felt a sense of mastery on the topic of space, spaciousness and softening. Then this happens..........This week I dove back into some supported emotionally centered Counselling sessions. What did I find a nice tidy little box of contained emotions? Patterns long held deep in me. I have heard the invitation before to find more space around a fear, or an uncertainty and I held onto the arrogance that comes from experience sometimes. The proud Yogi in me convinced me I was already there; I was already "open". The wholehearted place in me can see the shame that has had a grip on me.
Today I surrendered my mastery and opted for surrender. Today I can feel the joy of sadness and the gratitude for forgiveness. I am looking for more space once again!